Friday, April 11, 2014

How to Receive Compliments

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Who doesn't appreciate a good compliment? I have noticed some people (including myself) have trouble receiving compliments. I will go over some simple guidelines of how to do it properly in normal, everyday conversation.


Let's say a guy says to a girl, "You look really pretty today " a girl can respond many different ways . . .


Bad Example #1
"I know."


Suddenly you're not as pretty anymore. I learned recently that arrogance is actually a sign of insecurity, an attempt to mask or compensate flaws. I don't know if these girls are just playing a game, trying to sound like they're "all that" and the guy would be lucky to date a girl so far out of his league, but I'm allergic to cockiness, so peace out.

 


Bad Example #2
"No I don't. I look so ugly today."


At first I assume she's playing a game, like she's looking for reassurance wanting the guy to tell her again. So then when she rejects the follow-up reassurance I realize she honestly believes she doesn’t look pretty. This is sad to me, and this also becomes a subconscious, implied insult to the guy saying "You are wrong. You have bad judgment. And you have bad taste in women." Even if this is her attempt to avoid Bad Example #1, low self-esteem is almost as unattractive as arrogance. Remember, if a lie is repeated often enough (i.e. “milk makes your bones strong”) eventually it will be accepted as truth. So over time the guy will end up being convinced, “Perhaps she really isn’t as pretty as I thought . . .


And as a side note, guys love simple. Guys grew up seeing his mom in the home not dolled up everyday, and his mother became his definition of beauty. So if you're wearing a pony tail and feel gross, you could be the prettiest girl some guys have seen all day with your beautiful simplicity.

 


Bad Example #3
" So you’re saying I normally don’t look pretty? "


How pessimistic! Hopefully she isn’t serious! Just in case, the guy could reply by saying “You look beautiful everyday.”
 

 

Bad Example #4
"I have a boyfriend."


What if he's not hitting on you and he's just being nice? Having a boyfriend doesn't disqualify you from receiving compliments. Not classy. Chill, girl. Chill.


So what do you say when you receive a compliment? The answer is easy. No need to take out a pen and paper, there are only two words you need to remember:


”Thank you.”


Say it even if you disagree. After that it's fair game where you have the option to say anything you want.

If you like him, say "You don't look too bad yourself, handsome."

If you don’t like him, say "Go take a hike."

If you really don’t like him, and you want him to stay as far away from you as possible, say
"I have explosive diarrhea."

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